Posted in Intimacy

Watch what you wear

Photo credit: five blondes (Flickr)

Photo credit: five blondes (Flickr)

No, I’m not going to admonish women to think twice before they don that cleavage-revealing blouse or those shorts that could double as a bottom for a bathing suit. I’m actually going to use this post to encourage both women and men to be mindful of what they wear because it will affect how they feel, think and behave.

A recent study, as discussed in a Psychology Today article by Peggy Drexler, Ph.D, made a strong connection between what study participants wore and their cognition. Other studies, as mentioned in the article, have proposed that much like confident body posture can cause a person to behave more confidently, wearing clean, cared-for clothing can cause one to behave with pride and care. It serves to reason, then, that wearing your gym clothes readies your brain for going to the gym and behave in a way that aligns with physical fitness. Wearing your gym clothes does not ready your brain for going out with your spouse for a special anniversary dinner. Putting thought into the way we clothe our bodies (and, of course, the way we maintain physical hygiene) matters for ourselves and for our marriage.

Dr. Drexler states, “When we put on a stained t-shirt and an ill-fitting pair of jeans, our brain thinks it needn’t try so hard…” If one is about to embark on installing drywall (which my husband is doing as we speak and looks far better than the image I get from this quote), then perhaps the stained tee and non-flattering jeans are ok; however, choosing that ensemble as your everyday, go-to outfit, does little for yourself and sends an “I don’t really care about myself or our relationship” message to your spouse.

Do your clothes reflect a healthy outlook on yourself and your marriage?

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About Lori Mitton

Lori Mitton is a licensed clinical psychotherapist (MA, LLP) specializing in marriage and family therapy. She is co-founder of Permanent Passionate Partnership.